You know... No matter what you do, it all comes down to whether the person at the top likes you or not. You could following procedures that are stamped out in black and white, yet if there is a person who doesn't like you who is part of the procedure, all the work you did or do doesn't mean anything. However, it comes to my family, the scum then takes on a whole new level and the level of suffering is extended to those around you.. I will not talk about that now because I am so pissed off. But here is the ironic part- when I make a comment, because I write something that is not favorable to people, they lash out at me for going against 'their norms'. To them, I will say that as part of the logical search for the truth, you need to keep your mind open and get both sides of the story. A good example of that is a video clip I saw of two protesters who were asked what the protest was about and why they were there. They simply looked each other and shrugged their shoulders and replied that they didn't know. So..how can a person take part in a protest or demonstration if they don't know what it was for. I also understand the concept of joining a protest in solidarity of the protesters and their message. Now, here and in many other places, people throw around terms like 'Zionist' and such. They are angry and have tons of animosity toward them, yet when you ask them, a lot of times they reply a with the same manufactured response that proponents use for their argument so it brings me to this question- Why do you hate something so much and so fervently yet don't know why you hate them, then they could classified as a 'traveler' who 'jumps on the bandwagon' simply because other people are doing it. But what these don't realize, that the opposing viewpoint could form a consensus where it is part of the norm. What happens? The message gets lost, although they speak the line that's from what people who write and it founds as prepared and generic than the message being used to disprove you. That's where verification comes in. Now when I read stories that are supported by news broadcasts, the 2 main sources are RTN in Russia and Press TV. Each of them provide news that actually is contradictory to what is reporting on CNN or MSNBC. However, such as CNN and BBC, these channels also are state-sponsored and the news they provide has to be reviewed to make sure that the news stories correlate to what they want people to know. Here is the $$ Billion question- what do I believe in? Who do I trust? The answer is; no one. When I read an article, I always question its veracity and if the stories are interesting to me or if the news article has information I need or want, I then google it in the news section, type the key words and read it from a number of sources. Is the truth found in these articles? Nope. However, the bits and pieces I see that tell the story from opposing viewpoints start to come to come together with statements and excerpts that are either similar or closely related. Do I do that with everything I read about? Yes. I can't side with one side without seeing or hearing the other side. Although I might not agree with the information I find, but it gives me a reference in which I can use to form my thoughts and opinions about a topic. Does that have to mean I have to stick to the same topic or side of an argument all the time? Absolutely not! That is the membership doctrine within established political parties. Yet because are humans, we are given the amazing privilege to form opinions on a variety of topics. Now couple that with the fact that we live in a free society, just because I commented on one side of the spectrum, it doesn't mean I accept that message- why? I am not here to join a fringe group or make friends (I am a friendly and sociable person, but I am not out here to seek acceptance and friendship. I am here for the same reason you all are here, to give information and get information about topics that concerns me and help me formulate my opinion that will answer my question of 'why?' Some of you know who I am and know some of my circumstance. Well, here is an update on that- to those of you do care- I got an estimation as to when my liver may shut down and the estimated time both my kidneys will fail. I was told that if I'm not dead by July or August, that I will simply be waiting until the time comes. I am happy to know my brothers and my dad now, they are making my final moments seem peaceful. Also, I feel privileged to have reconnected with my daughter, who is now 16. I want to talk about that because what is happening now is in response to what the state is doing to us. She was born while my home station was South Korea. For reasons related to my job, I was not able to be there for the birth. Also, when I was shot twice while on assignment in Ethiopia, when I was first medevaced to Germany and then on to the US, one of the doctors contacted my ex (who was my emergency contact) and said that because of my wounds, coupled with the other injuries I sustained while on assignment, they were doing the best they can. She took that to mean I was dying. When she fell on hard times and her kids were taken away, when she was asked about the father, she said I was dead. I had tried to find out about where my daughter was, yet I got no where. Then this past August, just out of curiosity, I acted like I won a million dollars when I saw her photo and profile on FB. Not only did she look like me, the comments she made were similar to things I would say. What blew me away was when she first called me and the first words she said was 'Hi, dad.' Honestly, I thought I would never hear those words. The past several months have seemed like a miracle because I found a new link to my family and one of the crazy thing was, I never lost that feeling of surprise when she calls me dad...call it 'parental wonder'.. However, there were some very dark things that really broke my heart- she was in a home from the age of 6 until she was 11 with a foster family where the foster dad sexually molested her. She reported it to DCF and they claim to have taken all the foster kids out of the house and did an investigation. It was 2 years before a judge made a decision- in which they closed the case and said that there was no substantiated proof of any kind of molestation and wrote in her file she was a pathological liar. When the file was closed, DCF sent the kids taken from the home back there, including her now-10 year old half sister who now runs away because the father is abusing her now, If the courts had found the foster dad guilty, not only would the foster dad be put on the sexual offenders' registry, DFC would have to explain why they didn't find or report anything to the main DCF office. When the foster parents and the social workers tried to tell me that she was a liar, I wouldn't believe it one bit. And as her dad, I wanted to get her things for school because was moved into a new home. One of the first things was a cellphone because the phone she had didn't have any reception at her school. Then, for Christmas, I bought her a laptop and those fancy headphones. She was kept in her room after school for 3 months and she didn't have anything to do while she was confined to her room (to anyone who had been in the system knows that being in a foster home is like a craps shoot, you either are lucky to be placed in a home where they only rape and molest you or unfortunate enough to be in a home where you would be physically and emotionally abused- sadly nothing has changed. Anyway, they complained that I was spoiling her and that I was going against their plans to have her earn EVERYTHING. I think it is a good idea if they gave any positive feedback. But, that would be asking too much. Everything came to a head last Thursday, as I said before I had warned everyone responsible for her care that she was having problems in school, yet they dismissed what I told them. So as soon as my daughter arrived at school, some kids started picking on her and she hit her boiling point. As she was being taken away in an ambulance, I was the first person she called, not her social workers, not the foster family, me- her biological dad. Now she is in a hospital for an evaluation and because of my disregard, when this matter goes before a judge, I will most likely get a court order to stay away and not contact my daughter. So, I am being penalized for caring and helping my daughter and giving her a chance to, at least, enjoy what time she had left as an adult. You know, someone said that the state and DCF goes after those deadbeat dads who try to avoid to have anything to do with their children. As part of the now-vain process of establishing paternity (because my ex listed me as dead) was to do a criminal background check and a DNA test. Now the technician who took my swab, asked me about the situation and I told her that I was in the process of establishing paternity of my daughter and as I explained everything, she noticed that there was no bull shit in my story and that I was actively volunteering to do something that she says she does when she goes to prisons where the guys are sentenced for not paying child support. She said that in the years she's been gathering samples for paternity tests, I was only sole male sample who was looking forward toward establishing paternity. Now the tests are done and the results are written down. However, the lab that performed the DNA test will not release the results until they get the money in their hand and the state has said that they would not make a check out until about 30 days after the exam was done, yet the tests are usually completed in only 2-3 days, so they've been sitting on it for almost a month already. But now because of this development, the tests don't matter because after all is said and done, I have to wait another 14 months so some government official could exercise their power and position not for the good of the people but for their own advancement and then go to great lengths to cover their own fuck ups. Now, to the LL community- Do I have a reason, a completely logical justification to be angry at the people who will prevent me from meeting the only thing that is good in my life? Do I have a good reason or logical explanation to support these people who have done nothing but cover their own asses at the expense of me and my daughter and even 2 of my brothers? I said this countless times- the US likes to burn the bridges it has with people who have done nothing but tried to help and them be thankful for what the government had done for me. They repay me by disregarding my health to the point that I have between 4-6 months to live before I vanish in the wind. If you said no to any of these things, you're right and I don't give a fuck anymore, I am already going to die before the first of the year- though I am now making payments for my funeral arrangements. The money I set aside to help my daughter when she goes to college was instead to buy a burial plot and for the hand-picked coffin I will be sleeping in for eternity. It breaks my heart to know that I am not going to see her go off to the prom, I can't attend her graduation ceremony or see the surprise on my face when she opens her Christmas girls....if anyone knows this feeling, they know the pain it is to know they have a child who loves them, yet is unable to see them. Again I ask, do I have any justification to like or support the very people who purposely withheld medical care to the point where I am too weak to leave my bed and be inflicted with bouts of nerve spasms that are so violent at night that I am afraid of getting out of bed for fear of falling down. Now, how can I appreciate a government who stole money from a totally disabled young man (my brother), money that could be used to buy new clothes and pay emergency medical bills. In the past 6-7 years, we've only taken out about $4000 for both Christmas and birthday gifts. Now the account is zero because it was used to pay for court costs, lawyer fees- for a lawyer who fought us every step of the way and accounting fees. This puts my dad in a disadvantage and stressed-out because he doesn't know he is going to do for my brother's gifts. Right now, I am at my wits end. I went through the phase where I would vent out my anger by yelling so loud at these assholes that I rattled the windows and lost my voice. I know right now, anything I say or do will be used as justification for keeping my daughter away from me. They are purposely abusing their power to make a point and they don't care who is hurt or suffering in the process. What am I gonna do? As we obviously know, this site is a place were people can debate about what is true and where people could expose the wrongs being done in the world. I sent an email to Mark Merek to say thank you for opening and managing his site, Best Gore. Also this one too. People have spent way too long being slaves to what the media says as the truth. The news programs only take one said and try to find people and things to back it up. People are fed up with hearing side of the story and sites like this one, allow a person to see first-hand stories and news in places where such stories are censored. When ES left his job and exposed the domestic surveillance program, he joined the legion of people like Julian Assange who takes personal risks in order to tell the truth. The government is using its power and influence to try to get him and Julian Assange was arrested on trumped up charges- if they knew that if he was being extradited for releasing details, the British would have let him go. Now that brings up the point of this thread. Now that I know possibly when I will die and I will never see my daughter or even possibly having her attend my funeral. What do I owe the government? To answer that, if officials involved in this matter, do you think they would give their apologies? Of course not. I am not bound by anything or obligation to keep what I know and not discuss it on an open forum. As of right now, I have nothing and I am defeated and anything I do, even it is legit, is not the right thing. So here it is I mentioned that I knew the final Russian soldier beheaded in Dagestan because his VDV unit was working with us during the "Partner for Peace'.. The people who brag the most are those within the system. Like ES who had access to sensitive documentation and then releasing it for the rest of the world. Here it goes.... ANNEXATION OF KOREA TO THE JAPANESE Japan established a colony government in Korea. The battle for control over Korea started in 1894, when Japanese won a war against China over control of the Korean peninsula. After winning another war, this time with Russia in 1905, the Japanese gradually began taking control over government infrastructure until the declaration of annexation was finalized in 1910. Before taking complete control over Korea, nations with colonies in Asia met with the Japanese to discuss their invasions of both Korea and China. However the colonial powers would came to an agreement that they would recognize Japanese sovereignty over Korea under the condition that the Japanese would stop supplying weapons to anti-colonial groups. This set the stage for formal complete control of Korea from 1910 until the end of the war in 1945. PEARL HARBOR- Believe it, the attack was a red flag. The government knew about the attack far in advance after intercepting cables between the German and the Japanese embassies. The government knew that if the whole fleet was anchored there, the US' ability to retaliate against Japan would be in peril. A few days before the attack, half the fleet was ordered out to sea under the guise of maneuvers. When the Japanese attacked, the US had the justification to attack Japan. Japan attacked Pearl Harbor only for the purpose of initiating negotiations to remove troops from the Philippines and hold talks about the resumption of trade in material necessary for the Japanese war effort. KOREAN MEN FORCED INTO THE JAPANESE ARMY- Reports that Koreans were kidnapped and forced in the Japanese are only partially true. The fact is that many of them voluntarily joined the army, not because of their love for Japan, but because of Japan's promotion of the war as a war for racial supremacy , vilifying Europe and the US as powers who wanted to take over the whole region. But it was Japan that was attempting regional domination.
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